Life Transitions
Counselling for life-stage transitions – adolescence, career change, and perimenopause
or midlife – in Hong Kong and online across Southeast Asia and Australia/NZ.
Life Transitions counselling supports people moving through a significant life-stage shift — whether that's adolescence itself, a career changing shape, or the identity shifts that come with perimenopause and midlife. Figuring out who you are and where you belong is itself a life-stage transition that frequently shows up in adolescence, as well as later in adulthood. I hold a Master of Counselling and an ICF Associate Certified Coach (ACC) credential, and I work with clients in person in Hong Kong and online across Southeast Asia and Australia/New Zealand.
If you're a teenager figuring out who you are
Welcome to this space. It's normal to feel like you don't know who you are or don't fit in right now – even if it seems like everyone else has already figured it out. They usually haven't; it just looks that way from the outside.
Psychologist Erik Erikson gave this stage a name: identity vs. role confusion, the fifth of the eight stages in his theory of psychosocial development. His point was that questioning who you are isn't a crisis to be avoided – it's the actual developmental task of adolescence, and working through it is what builds a stable sense of identity later on. So if you're wondering what's happening to you, or whether something's wrong, the answer is: probably not — this is what this stage of life is supposed to feel like, even when it feels uncomfortable.
If you've also moved between countries or schools, this can be more complicated – there's research on the psychological effects of relocating during childhood and adolescence, and it's worth knowing that some of what you're feeling may be about identity development generally, and some of it may be about cross-cultural adjustment. If the second part is what's resonating more, the Identity page on this site goes further into that.
If you're a parent looking for support for your teenager
A few things that bring parents to this page: a teenager who's become withdrawn or quieter than usual, ongoing friendship difficulties, a move between countries or schools that's unsettled them, or simply a period where they don't seem like themselves. These are common, and usually what helps is a space for your teenager to work through it with someone who isn't you and isn't a teacher – not because something has gone wrong at home, but because some of this is easier to say out loud to someone outside it.
I spent over 15 years teaching in international schools across Hong Kong, Australia, Singapore, and China before training as a counsellor, and separately coached teens and parents from 2019 to 2025. I understand the specific pressures of international school life – frequent moves, friends leaving often, cross-cultural identity, academic pressure – rather than needing it explained from scratch. How sessions work, and how confidentiality is handled between you, your teenager, and me, is explained to both of you before starting – please see the FAQ page.
If you're facing a career change
Should I stay, or should I go? That question can sit with you for months before you do anything about it, because it's rarely just about the job – it's about whether the work still fits who you are now, not just who you were when you took it. Losing interest in a career you once cared about is a real and legitimate reason to want support, even without a crisis forcing the decision.
If you're considering a career change, it helps to get specific rather than staying in the general feeling of being "over it": is it this particular role, this organisation, or the field itself that no longer fits? What would need to be true for staying to feel right again? Working through that distinction – plainly, without a numbered checklist standing in for the conversation – is usually more useful than a generic list of "signs it's time to quit."
If you're moving through perimenopause or midlife
It's common to reach a point in your 40s or 50s where you don't quite feel like yourself anymore – where your usual patience, motivation, or sense of who you are seems to have shifted without a clear reason. If you've searched something like "is it normal to have an identity crisis in your 40s," the answer is yes, this is
a common experience, and it doesn't mean anything has gone wrong.
Perimenopause is often part of this picture. Hormonal changes during perimenopause can affect mood and emotional regulation in ways that can feel like a personality change, even though nothing about who you are has actually changed underneath it. The same is true of what's often called a "midlife crisis" – a cluster of questioning, restlessness, or reassessment that shows up for many people around this stage of life. Rather than framing this as something to avoid, it's more useful to ask how to move through it well: with support, without judgment, and without needing to have it all resolved on a deadline. For most people, this period does ease – it's a phase to move through, not a permanent state.
One thing I want to be direct about: if you've lost interest in nearly everything, most of the time, for weeks on end – not just a dip in motivation for work or a hobby, but a broader flatness – that's worth mentioning to a doctor alongside anything we explore together in counselling, since it can also be a sign of depression and not only a perimenopausal symptom. Naming that isn't meant to alarm you; it's intended to make sure the right kind of support is in place alongside this work.
How I work
Sessions follow the same counselling-led approach described on the About page. With teenage clients specifically, that approach is adapted with more attention to pacing and how much structure versus open space is helpful, session by session.
Session details, confidentiality, and reach
Sessions run in person in Hong Kong and online for clients across Southeast Asia and Australia/New Zealand. For adolescent clients, online sessions are subject to a conversation with parents about time zones and appropriate setup. See the FAQs page for how confidentiality with minors is handled, the Fees page for session details, or book a session directly.
Common questions
At what age does identity confusion usually happen, and when does it end?
Child psychoanalyst Erik Erikson placed this stage broadly across adolescence, though the exact age varies by individual – some of this questioning can also resurface at later life transitions, which is part of why it shows up again around career change or midlife.
How do I know if it's the job or the whole field that doesn't fit anymore?
This usually takes some direct reflection on what specifically has changed – the day-to-day work, the people, the values of the organization, or your own priorities. It's a common enough question that it's worth exploring properly in a session rather than trying to answer it from a list.
How long does perimenopause last, and at what age does it typically begin?
Perimenopause typically begins in the 40s (sometimes late 30s) and can last several years before menopause itself. These are medical questions best confirmed with a doctor or GP – this page focuses on the emotional and identity side of that transition, not the medical specifics.
What age range do you work with for adolescent clients?
From age 9 onwards.
Will you tell me what my child says in sessions?
Confidentiality with adolescent clients is handled thoughtfully and explained clearly to both parent and teenager before starting – see the FAQ page for the full policy, or ask directly before booking.
Do you work with clients outside Hong Kong?
Yes – sessions run online for clients across Southeast Asia and Australia/New Zealand.